Last week, the Internet was abuzz with talk about the latest innovation in the sex-meets-tech market, the iPad compatible Fleshlight.
In case you aren’t already familiar with this bestselling sex toy, the Fleshlight is a male masturbator (aka: thing you can put your penis into) that comes in a case and resembles an oversized flashlight.
Although the makers of the Fleshlight already offer all sorts of customization options to meet your masturbating needs, they have stepped up their game with the release of plans for a Fleshlight you can attach to your iPad.
That’s right, gentlemen! Soon you’ll be able to strap your Fleshlight to the underside of your iPad, download a few sexy pictures or videos to play on the screen, and thrust away to your heart’s content!
This latest addition to the sex-meets-tech market is just one of the many ways technology is working its way into our pants.
Have you ever heard the term “teledildonics”? It’s an absolutely awful word, but a pretty cool concept. The idea behind teledildonics (also known as cyberdildonics) is that you use a sex toy that is connected to a computer, and controlled by either a computer program, or another person, over the Internet.
One of the leaders in the field of teledildonics is an American company called RealTouch. They have developed a male masturbator similar to the Fleshlight but with a few bonus features. The RealTouch device has moving parts on the inside (that get warm and self-lubricate) so you don’t actually have to do any of the work yourself.
And, to make it even more impressive, it can be hooked up to your computer via USB and synchronized with porn videos available on the RealTouch website. This means that all of the movement happening inside the device matches what is happening on the screen. The company promises that “you feel as if you are a part of the movie instead of just watching it.”
Now, I can hear all of you ladies asking “What about me?” Well, can I interest you in a vibrator that picks up the beat of your favourite music?
The OhMiBod series is a line of vibrators that vibrate based on sound. The company offers a wide range of different styles, some of which are small enough, and discrete enough, to wear out in public. I don’t know about you guys, but next time I see a girl on the dance floor at iRock looking like she is having a little too much fun, I’m going to be suspicious.
But, if music isn’t really your thing, you can download the OhMiBod app that lets you (or some lucky person) control the speed and intensity of the vibrations using an iPhone. And, on top of that, you can save your favourite patterns to use again and again. Seriously … what can’t you do with an iPhone!!? (Side note: This might explain why Blackberry users always look so serious …)
And last but not least, these developers aren’t just trying to corner the sex market, they’re also desperately trying (with mixed results) to figure out how to put the love back into sex technology. Some concepts that are under development include a remotely controlled t-shirt that hugs the wearer, a phone that can transmit the movements of a kiss, and a light you hang above your bed that simulates a long-distance partner’s touch. Unfortunately, none of these products have made it to the market yet.
As the Telus slogan goes, “The Future is Friendly.” Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go recharge my iPhone.
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