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Ask Ashley Answer: I am interested in introducing some light bondage into sexual sessions with my girlfriend. How can I do this without freaking her out?

06 Sep

Bondage, for those of you who are unfamiliar, is the use of physical restraints during sex to enhance sexual pleasure. Bondage is often included in a larger spectrum of activities that has been given the acronym BDSM (Bondage & Discipline, Dominance & Submission, and Sadism & Masochism). Normally, bondage involves a dominant (“the one who ties”) and submissive (“the one who is tied”) partner, making it important to obtain both partner’s consent.

Bondage encompasses a variety of activities, for example, tying a partner’s appendages together (the use of handcuffs) or spreading the appendages and fastening them with chains are two types of bondage activities. The activities can also range in intensity from the use of simple blindfolds to the more extreme use of gags and wood stocks.

To some, bondage might seem a bit extreme but, according to several studies, approximately half of both men and women have experimented with some type of bondage activity.

So, how do you introduce the idea of bondage to a partner? First, try to avoid bringing it up during the act, you want to make sure your partner is as receptive as possible. The best time for discussion is to sit down with your partner during everyday activities (i.e., having dinner, watching TV, etc.). It can be a difficult thing to address with a partner because it can often be taken the wrong way, you do not want your partner to think your are dissatisfied. An easy way to approach the topic is by prefacing with “Hey, I read an interesting article the other day” or “Guess what so-and-so told me?” This way you can gauge your partner’s response and expand on the topic further if it feels right. If your partner is feeling slightly uncomfortable with the idea, you can always suggest starting out slow.

ALWAYS make sure to respect your partner, especially during bondage activities and make sure that you both feel as comfortable as possible.

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4 Comments

Posted by on September 6, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

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4 responses to “Ask Ashley Answer: I am interested in introducing some light bondage into sexual sessions with my girlfriend. How can I do this without freaking her out?

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